You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
