what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
