I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
