Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
