Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
