Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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