This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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