I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Sext me about skeletons
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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