I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
