He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
