I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
