Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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