He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
