just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
