You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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