Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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