I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Dick very happy bro
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
