Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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