is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
