what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
