please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
