I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
honey bunches of taint.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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