mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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