White coat. Heels.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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