Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
