I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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