DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize