so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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