me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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