Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
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