So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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