He uses pillows to masturbate.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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