Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
