Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
