dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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