I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
