girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
tell me about the fingering
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