i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
