Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Randomize
