Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
