He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
