If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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