so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
