At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
