I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
