Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Randomize
