she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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