I would go down on you faster than GM stock
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize