I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
