I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
