Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
